(no subject)

The awkward thing about finding a new fandom to love is that it's a bit double edged. On one hand, you're all fuck yes I have a Thing to enjoy, I want ALL THE FIC now, I am so happy!

And on the other hand you're a bit... okay do I want to engage with fandom here, or not? Because I have a hell of a lot of fandoms I'm not on speaking terms with because they make things worse and I've noticed this is a trend.

And I'm not sure if I'm shutting myself off from good company but fandom's a bit of a gamble that way, you know? I don't know. I think I'm having another one of those wanting to reach out and make new friends moments, but I'm also a little afraid of being burned. I've been burned a lot, I seem to have gone all NO NO NO GO AWAY in response and that... that's really bugging me.